1
00:00:01,627 --> 00:00:02,537
<i>DIPPER: Ah! Summer break!</i>

2
00:00:02,753 --> 00:00:04,869
-So do you want cheese on that, hon?
-WOMAN: Sure, Hank!

3
00:00:05,088 --> 00:00:09,252
<i>A time for leisure,
recreation and taking her easy.</i>

4
00:00:09,885 --> 00:00:11,000
<i>Unless you're me.</i>

5
00:00:11,220 --> 00:00:12,301
(YELLING)

6
00:00:13,263 --> 00:00:14,253
(SCREAMING)

7
00:00:16,225 --> 00:00:17,465
(CREATURE GROWLING)

8
00:00:17,726 --> 00:00:18,966
It's getting closer!

9
00:00:19,228 --> 00:00:20,343
(GROWLING)

10
00:00:26,235 --> 00:00:27,521
<i>My name is Dipper.</i>

11
00:00:27,736 --> 00:00:29,898
<i>The girl about to puke
is my sister Mabel.</i>

12
00:00:30,113 --> 00:00:31,854
<i>You may be wondering
what we're doing in a golf cart,</i>

13
00:00:32,074 --> 00:00:34,987
<i>fleeing from a creature
of unimaginable horror.</i>

14
00:00:36,662 --> 00:00:37,902
-Look out!
-Ah!

15
00:00:38,830 --> 00:00:39,820
(BOTH YELLING)

16
00:00:40,624 --> 00:00:43,537
<i>Rest assured,
there's a perfectly logical explanation.</i>

17
00:00:44,294 --> 00:00:46,285
(THEME MUSIC PLAYING)

18
00:01:25,460 --> 00:01:26,575
<i>DIPPER: Let's rewind.</i>

19
00:01:28,171 --> 00:01:31,880
<i>It all began when our parents decided
we could use some fresh air.</i>

20
00:01:32,092 --> 00:01:35,460
<i>They shipped us up North to a sleepy
town called Gravity Falls, Oregon,</i>

21
00:01:35,679 --> 00:01:37,761
<i>to stay at our great uncle's place
in the woods.</i>

22
00:01:39,850 --> 00:01:43,969
This attic is amazing!
Check out all my splinters!

23
00:01:44,646 --> 00:01:45,602
(BLEATING)

24
00:01:45,814 --> 00:01:46,895
And there's a goat on my bed.

25
00:01:47,107 --> 00:01:48,563
Hey, friend.

26
00:01:49,484 --> 00:01:52,192
Oh! Yes, you can keep chewing
on my sweater!

27
00:01:52,404 --> 00:01:53,360
(LAUGHING)

28
00:01:53,614 --> 00:01:55,946
<i>My sister tended
to look on the bright side of things.</i>

29
00:01:56,158 --> 00:01:57,023
<i>'lay!</i>

30
00:01:57,242 --> 00:01:58,653
Grass!

31
00:01:58,869 --> 00:02:01,736
<i>But I was having a hard time
getting used to our new surroundings.</i>

32
00:02:02,039 --> 00:02:03,120
-BOO!
-(SCREAMS)

33
00:02:04,041 --> 00:02:05,076
(GUFFAWING)

34
00:02:05,292 --> 00:02:08,705
<i>And then there was
our Great Uncle Stan. That guy.</i>

35
00:02:08,962 --> 00:02:09,872
(CONTINUES LAUGHING)

36
00:02:10,088 --> 00:02:11,169
(COUGHING)

37
00:02:11,798 --> 00:02:12,754
It was worth it!

38
00:02:12,966 --> 00:02:15,674
<i>Our uncle had transformed his house
into a tourist trap</i>

39
00:02:15,886 --> 00:02:17,593
<i>he called the Mystery Shack.</i>

40
00:02:17,804 --> 00:02:19,795
<i>The real mystery
was why anyone came.</i>

41
00:02:20,891 --> 00:02:24,054
Ladies and gentlemen,
behold the Sascrotch!

42
00:02:25,812 --> 00:02:27,428
(ALL EXCLAIM EXCITEDLY)

43
00:02:27,814 --> 00:02:29,646
<i>And guess who had to work there.</i>

44
00:02:30,025 --> 00:02:31,686
-(DIPPER SIGHS)
-Oh!

45
00:02:31,902 --> 00:02:33,518
No touching the merchandise!

46
00:02:33,737 --> 00:02:37,446
<i>It looked like it was gonna be the same,
boring routine all summer.</i>

47
00:02:37,658 --> 00:02:39,524
<i>Until one fateful day...</i>

48
00:02:41,870 --> 00:02:44,328
He's looking at it. He's looking at it!

49
00:02:45,415 --> 00:02:46,371
Uh...

50
00:02:46,583 --> 00:02:47,869
(READING)

51
00:02:52,839 --> 00:02:54,546
-I rigged it!
-DIPPER: Mabel?

52
00:02:54,758 --> 00:02:56,840
I know you're going through
your whole boy-crazy phase,

53
00:02:57,052 --> 00:02:59,794
but I think you're kind of overdoing it
with the crazy part.

54
00:03:00,013 --> 00:03:01,629
What? (BLOWS RASPBERRY)

55
00:03:01,848 --> 00:03:03,259
Come on, Dipper!

56
00:03:03,475 --> 00:03:05,682
This is our first summer
away from home.

57
00:03:05,894 --> 00:03:09,182
It's my big chance
to have an epic summer romance!

58
00:03:09,398 --> 00:03:11,935
Yeah, but do you need to flirt
with every guy you meet?

59
00:03:12,150 --> 00:03:16,644
My name is Mabel. But you can call me
the girl of your dreams!

60
00:03:16,863 --> 00:03:18,820
I'm joking!

61
00:03:19,032 --> 00:03:19,988
(LAUGHING)

62
00:03:20,450 --> 00:03:23,613
Oh, my gosh, you like turtles?
I like turtles, too!

63
00:03:23,829 --> 00:03:25,991
What is happening here?

64
00:03:26,540 --> 00:03:31,034
Come one, come all, to the Mattress
Prince's Kingdom of savings!

65
00:03:31,253 --> 00:03:33,460
-(WHISPERS) Take me with you!
-(SCREAMS)

66
00:03:33,880 --> 00:03:35,245
Mock all you want, brother,

67
00:03:35,465 --> 00:03:37,581
but I got a good feeling
about this summer.

68
00:03:37,801 --> 00:03:39,792
I wouldn't be surprised
if the man of my dreams

69
00:03:40,011 --> 00:03:41,843
walked through that door right now!

70
00:03:43,765 --> 00:03:44,800
(BELCHING)

71
00:03:45,142 --> 00:03:46,883
Oh! Oh! Not good! Ow.

72
00:03:47,102 --> 00:03:49,013
-Oh, why?
-(LAUGHING)

73
00:03:49,229 --> 00:03:50,685
All right, all right. Look alive, people!

74
00:03:50,897 --> 00:03:52,604
I need someone to go
hammer up these signs

75
00:03:52,816 --> 00:03:53,851
in the spooky part of the forest.

76
00:03:54,067 --> 00:03:54,932
-Not it!
-Not it!

77
00:03:55,152 --> 00:03:56,017
Also not it.

78
00:03:56,236 --> 00:03:57,192
Nobody asked you, Soos.

79
00:03:57,404 --> 00:03:58,894
I know. And I'm comfortable with that.

80
00:04:00,574 --> 00:04:02,736
Wendy, I need you to put up this sign.

81
00:04:02,951 --> 00:04:06,785
I would, but I, uh, can't, uh, reach it.

82
00:04:07,539 --> 00:04:09,121
I'd fire all of you if I could.

83
00:04:09,332 --> 00:04:12,791
All right, let's make it,
eeny-meeny-miny... You!

84
00:04:13,003 --> 00:04:13,913
Oh, what?

85
00:04:14,129 --> 00:04:17,247
Grunkle Stan, whenever I'm in those
woods I feel like I'm being watched.

86
00:04:17,466 --> 00:04:18,581
Ah, this again.

87
00:04:18,800 --> 00:04:20,791
I'm telling you, something weird
is going on in this town.

88
00:04:21,011 --> 00:04:23,469
Just today, my mosquito bite
spelled out "beware."

89
00:04:24,473 --> 00:04:25,963
That says "bewarb."

90
00:04:28,059 --> 00:04:31,017
Look, kid, the whole "monsters
in the forest" thing is just local legend,

91
00:04:31,229 --> 00:04:34,096
drummed up by guys like me,
to sell merch to guys like that.

92
00:04:34,357 --> 00:04:35,518
(LAUGHING)

93
00:04:36,151 --> 00:04:37,357
So quit being so paranoid!

94
00:04:38,320 --> 00:04:39,310
(SIGHS)

95
00:04:40,155 --> 00:04:41,361
(WIND WHISTLING)

96
00:04:45,410 --> 00:04:48,948
Ugh. Grunkle Stan...
Nobody ever believes anything I say.

97
00:04:50,957 --> 00:04:52,368
-(METALLIC CLANK)
-Huh?

98
00:04:54,211 --> 00:04:55,372
(CLANKING CONTINUES)

99
00:04:58,173 --> 00:04:59,459
(HINGES CREAK)

100
00:05:06,848 --> 00:05:08,589
-(MACHINERY WHIRRING)
-(BLEATING)

101
00:05:10,018 --> 00:05:10,974
What the...

102
00:05:26,535 --> 00:05:28,822
"It's hard to believe
it's been six years since I began

103
00:05:29,037 --> 00:05:32,951
"studying the strange and wondrous
secrets of Gravity Falls, Oregon."

104
00:05:37,921 --> 00:05:38,956
What is all this?

105
00:05:40,340 --> 00:05:43,378
"Unfortunately, my suspicions have
been confirmed. I'm being watched.

106
00:05:43,593 --> 00:05:45,459
"I must hide this book before he finds it.

107
00:05:45,679 --> 00:05:49,013
"Remember, in Gravity Falls,
there is no one you can trust."

108
00:05:50,058 --> 00:05:51,423
No one you can trust.

109
00:05:51,643 --> 00:05:52,599
-Hello!
-(YELLS)

110
00:05:53,103 --> 00:05:55,390
What you reading, some nerd thing?

111
00:05:55,730 --> 00:05:57,266
Uh, uh... It's nothing!

112
00:05:57,482 --> 00:05:58,813
(MOCKING) "Uh, uh. It's nothing!"

113
00:05:59,025 --> 00:06:02,188
(LAUGHING) What, are you
actually not gonna show me?

114
00:06:02,404 --> 00:06:03,519
Uh...

115
00:06:03,738 --> 00:06:05,228
Let's go somewhere private.

116
00:06:08,159 --> 00:06:11,322
It's amazing!
Grunkle Stan said I was being paranoid,

117
00:06:11,538 --> 00:06:15,031
but according to this book,
Gravity Falls has this secret dark side.

118
00:06:15,250 --> 00:06:16,160
Whoa!

119
00:06:16,376 --> 00:06:17,537
Shut up!

120
00:06:17,752 --> 00:06:21,461
And get this. After a certain point,
the pages just stop.

121
00:06:21,673 --> 00:06:24,415
Like the guy who was writing it
mysteriously disappeared.

122
00:06:24,634 --> 00:06:25,465
(DOORBELL RINGS)

123
00:06:25,677 --> 00:06:27,714
-Who's that?
-Well, time to spill the beans!

124
00:06:29,431 --> 00:06:32,014
Beans. This girl's got a date.

125
00:06:32,225 --> 00:06:33,260
(HOOTS)

126
00:06:33,810 --> 00:06:34,766
Let me get this straight.

127
00:06:34,978 --> 00:06:38,061
In the half hour I was gone,
you already found a boyfriend?

128
00:06:38,273 --> 00:06:42,813
What can I say?
I guess I'm just irresistible!

129
00:06:43,069 --> 00:06:45,151
-(DOORBELL RINGING)
-Oh! Coming!

130
00:06:47,824 --> 00:06:48,780
What you reading there, slick?

131
00:06:48,992 --> 00:06:54,203
<i>Oh! I was just catching up on...
Gold Chains for Old Men Magazine?</i>

132
00:06:54,414 --> 00:06:55,279
That's a good issue.

133
00:06:55,498 --> 00:06:59,958
Hey, family!
Say hello to my new boyfriend!

134
00:07:02,047 --> 00:07:02,957
'SUP-

135
00:07:03,173 --> 00:07:04,504
-Hey.
-How's it hanging?

136
00:07:04,716 --> 00:07:07,799
We met at the cemetery.
He's really deep.

137
00:07:08,011 --> 00:07:12,005
Oh! Little muscle there. That's...
What a surprise.

138
00:07:12,223 --> 00:07:13,634
So, what's your name?

139
00:07:13,850 --> 00:07:14,806
Uh...

140
00:07:15,018 --> 00:07:17,350
Normal... Man!

141
00:07:17,562 --> 00:07:18,643
He means Norman.

142
00:07:18,855 --> 00:07:20,562
Are you bleeding, Norman?

143
00:07:20,815 --> 00:07:21,805
(DRIPPING)

144
00:07:22,233 --> 00:07:23,348
It's jam.

145
00:07:24,027 --> 00:07:27,645
I love jam! Look at this!

146
00:07:28,031 --> 00:07:31,990
So, you wanna go,
hold hands or whatever?

147
00:07:32,827 --> 00:07:35,569
Oh, my goodness.
(GIGGLES) Don't wait up!

148
00:07:39,167 --> 00:07:40,157
(CRASHING)

149
00:07:40,418 --> 00:07:42,750
DIPPER: <i>There was something
about Norman that wasn't right.</i>

150
00:07:42,963 --> 00:07:45,045
<i>I decided to consult the journal.</i>

151
00:07:45,256 --> 00:07:47,042
"Known for their pale skin
and bad attitudes,

152
00:07:47,258 --> 00:07:50,467
"these creatures
are often mistaken for teenagers!

153
00:07:50,679 --> 00:07:52,590
"Beware Gravity Falls' nefarious..."

154
00:07:53,223 --> 00:07:54,839
-(GASPS)
-(THUNDER CRASHES)

155
00:07:55,058 --> 00:07:56,014
'SUP-

156
00:07:56,226 --> 00:07:57,682
Zombie!

157
00:07:57,894 --> 00:07:58,929
(ECHOING)

158
00:07:59,980 --> 00:08:03,348
Did someone say, "Crombie"?
What is that? Crombie.

159
00:08:03,566 --> 00:08:05,728
It's not even a word.
You're losing your mind.

160
00:08:06,403 --> 00:08:07,438
(GRUNTING)

161
00:08:10,240 --> 00:08:11,446
I like you.

162
00:08:11,658 --> 00:08:12,989
Oh, no! Mabel!

163
00:08:13,952 --> 00:08:15,693
No, no! Mabel, watch out!

164
00:08:21,835 --> 00:08:25,373
Daisies? You scallywag!

165
00:08:25,922 --> 00:08:28,880
Is my sister really dating a zombie?
Or am I just going nuts?

166
00:08:29,092 --> 00:08:30,799
It's a dilemma to be sure.

167
00:08:31,011 --> 00:08:34,379
I couldn't help but overhear you talking
aloud to yourself in this empty room.

168
00:08:34,597 --> 00:08:38,056
Soos, you've seen Mabel's boyfriend.
He's gotta be a zombie right?

169
00:08:38,435 --> 00:08:40,722
Hmm. How many brains
did you see the guy eat?

170
00:08:41,271 --> 00:08:42,306
Zero.

171
00:08:42,522 --> 00:08:45,310
Look, dude, I believe you. I'm always
noticing weird stuff in this town.

172
00:08:45,525 --> 00:08:48,062
Like the mailman?
Pretty sure that dude's a werewolf.

173
00:08:53,658 --> 00:08:55,240
But you gotta have evidence.

174
00:08:55,452 --> 00:08:57,910
Otherwise people are gonna think
you're a major league cuckoo-clock.

175
00:08:58,204 --> 00:09:00,411
As always, Soos, you're right.

176
00:09:00,623 --> 00:09:03,240
My wisdom is both a blessing,
and a curse.

177
00:09:03,460 --> 00:09:05,872
STAN: Soos! The portable toilets
are clogged again!

178
00:09:07,088 --> 00:09:08,169
I am needed elsewhere.

179
00:09:11,134 --> 00:09:14,297
DIPPER: <i>My sister could be in trouble.
It was time to get some evidence.</i>

180
00:09:17,223 --> 00:09:18,258
(GRUNTS)

181
00:09:20,226 --> 00:09:21,591
(GRUNTING)

182
00:09:29,611 --> 00:09:30,646
-(CRASH)
-(WOMAN SCREAMS)

183
00:09:31,071 --> 00:09:32,186
(BOTH LAUGHING)

184
00:09:33,573 --> 00:09:34,563
(EXCLAIMS)

185
00:09:37,994 --> 00:09:39,155
(BOTH LAUGHING)

186
00:09:40,497 --> 00:09:41,862
<i>I'd seen enough.</i>

187
00:09:44,084 --> 00:09:46,041
Mabel! We've got to talk about Norman!

188
00:09:46,252 --> 00:09:49,790
Isn't he the best? Check out this
giant smooch mark he gave me!

189
00:09:51,132 --> 00:09:52,622
-(EXCLAIMS)
-(LAUGHS)

190
00:09:53,134 --> 00:09:56,422
Gullible. It was just an accident
with the leaf blower.

191
00:09:59,516 --> 00:10:00,972
Kissing practice!

192
00:10:01,810 --> 00:10:02,845
Mmm.

193
00:10:03,353 --> 00:10:04,263
(MUFFLED SCREAMING)

194
00:10:04,479 --> 00:10:06,971
Turn it off! Turn it off!

195
00:10:07,440 --> 00:10:08,396
That was fun.

196
00:10:08,608 --> 00:10:13,193
No, Mabel, listen! I'm trying to tell you
that Norman is not what he seems!

197
00:10:15,073 --> 00:10:17,986
(GASPS) You think
he might be a vampire?

198
00:10:18,201 --> 00:10:19,691
That would be so awesome!

199
00:10:19,911 --> 00:10:20,867
Guess again, sister.

200
00:10:21,079 --> 00:10:22,160
-Sha-bam!
-Ah!

201
00:10:22,622 --> 00:10:24,329
Oh, wait. I'm sorry. Sha-bam!

202
00:10:24,833 --> 00:10:27,291
A zombie? That is not funny, Dipper.

203
00:10:27,502 --> 00:10:31,621
I'm not joking.
It all adds up, the bleeding, the limp.

204
00:10:31,840 --> 00:10:34,081
He never blinks! Have you noticed that?

205
00:10:34,300 --> 00:10:36,758
Maybe he's blinking
when you're blinking.

206
00:10:36,970 --> 00:10:39,507
Mabel, remember what the book said
about Gravity Falls?

207
00:10:39,931 --> 00:10:41,137
Trust no one!

208
00:10:41,349 --> 00:10:44,182
Well, what about me, huh?
Why can't you trust me?

209
00:10:44,394 --> 00:10:45,304
Beep-DOD!

210
00:10:45,520 --> 00:10:47,306
Mabel! He's gonna eat your brain!

211
00:10:47,522 --> 00:10:48,728
Dipper, listen to me.

212
00:10:48,940 --> 00:10:51,648
Norman and I are going on a date
at 5:00,

213
00:10:51,860 --> 00:10:55,694
and I'm gonna be adorable,
and he's gonna be dreamy.

214
00:10:55,905 --> 00:11:00,069
And I'm not gonna let you ruin it
with one of your crazy conspiracies!

215
00:11:02,036 --> 00:11:03,868
(SIGHS) What am I gonna do?

216
00:11:04,247 --> 00:11:05,988
-(CLOCK OWL HOOTS)
-(DOORBELL RINGS)

217
00:11:06,583 --> 00:11:07,618
Coming!

218
00:11:08,418 --> 00:11:09,954
Hey, Norman. How do I look?

219
00:11:12,172 --> 00:11:13,378
Shiny!

220
00:11:14,007 --> 00:11:15,918
You always know what to say.

221
00:11:19,387 --> 00:11:22,550
Soos is right.
I don't have any real evidence.

222
00:11:23,433 --> 00:11:27,552
I guess I can be kind of paranoid
sometimes and... Wait, what?

223
00:11:30,940 --> 00:11:31,850
(SCREAMS)

224
00:11:32,066 --> 00:11:33,852
I was right! Oh, my gosh! Oh, my gosh!

225
00:11:34,068 --> 00:11:36,230
Grunkle Stan! Grunkle Stan!
Grunkle Stan!

226
00:11:36,446 --> 00:11:38,778
And here we have
rock-that-looks-like-a-face rock.

227
00:11:38,990 --> 00:11:40,947
The rock that looks like a face.

228
00:11:41,159 --> 00:11:42,320
Does it look like a rock?

229
00:11:42,535 --> 00:11:44,572
-No, it looks like a face.
-Is it a face?

230
00:11:44,787 --> 00:11:46,152
It's a rock that looks like a face!

231
00:11:47,081 --> 00:11:48,287
Over here! Grunkle Stan!

232
00:11:48,499 --> 00:11:50,740
For the fifth time, it's not an actual face!

233
00:11:51,085 --> 00:11:52,371
(GRUNTS IN FRUSTRATION)

234
00:11:54,130 --> 00:11:56,462
Finally, we're alone.

235
00:11:56,674 --> 00:11:59,291
Yes. Alone!

236
00:11:59,844 --> 00:12:01,585
Stan! Stan!

237
00:12:02,347 --> 00:12:04,133
Wendy! Wendy, Wendy!

238
00:12:04,349 --> 00:12:07,637
I need to borrow the golf cart
so I can save my sister from a zombie!

239
00:12:09,145 --> 00:12:10,977
Try not to hit any pedestrians.

240
00:12:14,734 --> 00:12:17,772
Dude, it's me. Soos.
This is for the zombies.

241
00:12:17,987 --> 00:12:18,852
Thanks.

242
00:12:19,072 --> 00:12:21,234
And this is in case you see a pifiata.

243
00:12:21,699 --> 00:12:23,360
Uh, thanks?

244
00:12:23,952 --> 00:12:25,784
Better safe than sorry!

245
00:12:27,580 --> 00:12:31,289
Mabel, now that we've gotten to know
each other,

246
00:12:31,960 --> 00:12:33,826
there's something I should tell you.

247
00:12:35,255 --> 00:12:38,122
Oh, Norman. You can tell me anything.

248
00:12:38,341 --> 00:12:40,252
<i>(THINKING) Please be a vampire!
Please be a vampire!</i>

249
00:12:40,718 --> 00:12:43,460
All right, just don't freak out, okay?

250
00:12:43,680 --> 00:12:45,387
Just keep an open mind. Be cool.

251
00:12:52,021 --> 00:12:54,683
Is this weird? Is this too weird?
You need to sit down?

252
00:12:55,817 --> 00:13:01,733
All right. I'll explain. So, we're gnomes.
First off, get that one out of the way.

253
00:13:01,948 --> 00:13:02,858
Uh...

254
00:13:03,074 --> 00:13:07,739
I'm Jeff. And here we have Carson,
Steve, Jason and...

255
00:13:07,954 --> 00:13:09,661
I'm sorry, I always forget your name.

256
00:13:09,872 --> 00:13:11,158
Shmebulock.

257
00:13:11,499 --> 00:13:14,457
Shmebulock, yes! Anyways.

258
00:13:14,669 --> 00:13:18,287
Long story short, us gnomes
have been looking for a new queen.

259
00:13:18,506 --> 00:13:19,371
Right, guys?

260
00:13:19,590 --> 00:13:22,173
(TOGETHER) Queen, queen!

261
00:13:22,677 --> 00:13:24,634
Ha. So what do you say?

262
00:13:28,016 --> 00:13:30,303
Will you join us, in holy matrinomy.

263
00:13:30,518 --> 00:13:34,182
Matri... Matrimony! Blah!
Can't talk today.

264
00:13:35,565 --> 00:13:41,060
Look, I'm sorry, guys.
You're really sweet, but I'm a girl.

265
00:13:41,279 --> 00:13:45,364
And you're gnomes. And it's like, what?

266
00:13:46,159 --> 00:13:47,149
Yikes!

267
00:13:47,785 --> 00:13:50,152
We understand.
We'll never forget you, Mabel.

268
00:13:51,622 --> 00:13:52,828
Because we're gonna kidnap you.

269
00:13:53,041 --> 00:13:54,156
-Huh?
-(YELLING)

270
00:13:54,667 --> 00:13:55,702
(SCREAMING)

271
00:13:56,377 --> 00:13:59,665
Don't worry, Mabel!
I'll save you from that zombie!

272
00:14:00,715 --> 00:14:02,080
MABEL: Help!

273
00:14:02,467 --> 00:14:03,957
Hold on!

274
00:14:07,138 --> 00:14:08,048
The more you struggle,

275
00:14:08,264 --> 00:14:10,426
the more awkward
this is gonna be for everybody!

276
00:14:10,641 --> 00:14:13,178
Just... Okay!
Just get her arm there, Steve.

277
00:14:13,811 --> 00:14:15,552
HEY,- let go of me!

278
00:14:18,232 --> 00:14:19,267
(GROANS)

279
00:14:21,152 --> 00:14:23,439
What the heck is going on here?

280
00:14:23,988 --> 00:14:25,023
(HISSES)

281
00:14:25,239 --> 00:14:27,651
Dipper! Norman turned out to be
a bunch of gnomes!

282
00:14:27,867 --> 00:14:30,655
And they're total jerks! Hair! Hair! Hair!

283
00:14:30,870 --> 00:14:32,986
Gnomes? I was way off.

284
00:14:34,499 --> 00:14:37,082
"Gnomes.
Little men of the Gravity Falls forest.

285
00:14:37,293 --> 00:14:38,704
"Weaknesses, Unknown."

286
00:14:38,920 --> 00:14:40,536
Oh, come on!

287
00:14:40,755 --> 00:14:42,746
Hey, hey! Let go of my sister!

288
00:14:42,965 --> 00:14:43,875
Oh. (LAUGHS)

289
00:14:44,092 --> 00:14:48,051
Hey, there! Um, you know, this is all
really just a big misunderstanding.

290
00:14:48,262 --> 00:14:49,969
You see, your sister's not in danger.

291
00:14:50,181 --> 00:14:51,671
She's just marrying
all one thousand of us

292
00:14:51,891 --> 00:14:54,303
and becoming our gnome queen
for all eternity.

293
00:14:54,519 --> 00:14:55,429
Isn't that right, honey?

294
00:14:55,645 --> 00:14:57,886
You guys are butt-faces!

295
00:14:58,439 --> 00:15:00,555
Give her back right now, or else!

296
00:15:00,858 --> 00:15:05,819
You think you can stop us, boy?
You have no idea what we're capable of.

297
00:15:06,030 --> 00:15:08,271
The gnomes are a powerful race!

298
00:15:08,491 --> 00:15:10,198
Do not trifle with the...

299
00:15:12,662 --> 00:15:13,618
(YELLS)

300
00:15:15,039 --> 00:15:18,031
He's getting away with our queen!
No, no, no!

301
00:15:18,251 --> 00:15:19,491
Seatbelt.

302
00:15:22,130 --> 00:15:24,667
You've messed
with the wrong creatures, boy.

303
00:15:24,882 --> 00:15:28,671
Gnomes of the forest, assemble!

304
00:15:40,356 --> 00:15:42,267
Hurry before they come after us!

305
00:15:42,483 --> 00:15:44,895
I wouldn't worry about it.
Did you see their little legs?

306
00:15:45,111 --> 00:15:46,021
The suckers are tiny!

307
00:15:46,237 --> 00:15:47,193
-(LOUD STOMPING)
-(BRAKES SCREECHING)

308
00:15:51,909 --> 00:15:52,944
Dang.

309
00:15:55,037 --> 00:15:57,369
All right, teamwork, guys.
Like we practiced!

310
00:15:57,999 --> 00:15:59,114
(ROARING)

311
00:15:59,667 --> 00:16:00,873
Move, move!

312
00:16:05,465 --> 00:16:07,047
Come back with our queen!

313
00:16:07,258 --> 00:16:08,419
It's getting closer!

314
00:16:19,061 --> 00:16:20,972
-(HORN HONKS)
-Shmebulock...

315
00:16:24,609 --> 00:16:25,849
I'll save you, Dipper!

316
00:16:31,782 --> 00:16:33,819
-Thanks, Mabel!
-Don't mention it.

317
00:16:38,873 --> 00:16:40,204
Look out!

318
00:16:40,500 --> 00:16:42,036
(BOTH SCREAMING)

319
00:16:47,423 --> 00:16:48,584
(BOTH GROANING)

320
00:16:50,593 --> 00:16:52,379
Stay back, man!

321
00:16:53,429 --> 00:16:54,419
(ROARING)

322
00:16:54,805 --> 00:16:55,840
(BOTH SCREAMING)

323
00:16:56,682 --> 00:16:57,968
Where's Grunkle Stan?

324
00:16:58,684 --> 00:17:01,597
Behold...
The world's most distracting object!

325
00:17:01,812 --> 00:17:02,802
(ALL EXCLAIMING)

326
00:17:03,022 --> 00:17:05,104
Just try to look away, you can't!

327
00:17:06,567 --> 00:17:08,478
I can't even remember
what I was talking about.

328
00:17:09,737 --> 00:17:10,943
JEFF: It's the end of the line, kids!

329
00:17:11,155 --> 00:17:13,772
Mabel, marry us
before we do something crazy!

330
00:17:13,991 --> 00:17:15,356
There's gotta be a way out of this.

331
00:17:16,827 --> 00:17:17,908
I gotta do it.

332
00:17:18,120 --> 00:17:20,862
What? Mabel!
Don't do this! Are you crazy?

333
00:17:21,332 --> 00:17:22,618
-Trust me.
-What?

334
00:17:22,833 --> 00:17:25,871
Dipper, just this once, trust me.

335
00:17:30,007 --> 00:17:32,499
All right, Jeff. I'll marry you.

336
00:17:32,718 --> 00:17:35,050
Hot dog! Help me down there, Jason.
Thanks, Andy.

337
00:17:35,263 --> 00:17:38,381
All right, left foot, there we go.
Watch those fingers, Mike.

338
00:17:41,561 --> 00:17:42,676
Eh? Eh?

339
00:17:45,064 --> 00:17:46,179
Bada-bing, bada-bam!

340
00:17:46,399 --> 00:17:48,185
Now let's get
you back into the forest honey.

341
00:17:48,401 --> 00:17:50,483
You may now kiss the bride.

342
00:17:51,279 --> 00:17:53,862
Well! Don't mind if I do.

343
00:17:59,412 --> 00:18:01,028
Hey, hey, wait a minute.

344
00:18:03,541 --> 00:18:04,827
What's going on?

345
00:18:05,418 --> 00:18:06,328
(SCREAMING)

346
00:18:06,544 --> 00:18:07,909
That's for lying to me!

347
00:18:09,839 --> 00:18:11,375
That's for breaking my heart!

348
00:18:11,674 --> 00:18:12,835
Ow! My face!

349
00:18:13,050 --> 00:18:15,712
And this is for messing with my brother!

350
00:18:15,928 --> 00:18:16,838
(GROANS)

351
00:18:17,054 --> 00:18:18,920
-Wanna do the honors?
-On three!

352
00:18:19,140 --> 00:18:20,630
-One! Two! Three!
-One! Two! Three!

353
00:18:23,060 --> 00:18:26,223
(SCREAMING) I'll get you back for this!

354
00:18:26,856 --> 00:18:27,766
(ALL SCREAMING)

355
00:18:27,982 --> 00:18:29,643
Who's giving orders? I need orders!

356
00:18:29,859 --> 00:18:31,645
My arms are tired.

357
00:18:32,528 --> 00:18:33,939
Anyone else wants some?

358
00:18:37,783 --> 00:18:38,944
(WHIMPERING)

359
00:18:40,202 --> 00:18:41,158
(BLEATING)

360
00:18:41,579 --> 00:18:42,569
(GNOME SCREAMING)

361
00:18:43,914 --> 00:18:48,033
Hey, Dipper,
I'm sorry for ignoring your advice.

362
00:18:48,252 --> 00:18:49,993
You really were just looking out for me.

363
00:18:50,463 --> 00:18:53,501
Oh, don't be like that.
You saved our butts back there!

364
00:18:53,716 --> 00:18:54,706
I guess I'm just sad

365
00:18:54,925 --> 00:18:57,883
that my first boyfriend turned out
to be a bunch of gnomes.

366
00:18:58,095 --> 00:19:01,087
Look on the bright side.
Maybe the next one will be a vampire.

367
00:19:01,307 --> 00:19:03,674
Oh! You're just saying that!

368
00:19:03,893 --> 00:19:05,475
Awkward sibling hug?

369
00:19:06,228 --> 00:19:07,343
Awkward sibling hug.

370
00:19:08,439 --> 00:19:09,429
-Pat. Pat.
-Pat. Pat.

371
00:19:09,815 --> 00:19:10,976
(ENTRY BELL RINGS)

372
00:19:12,360 --> 00:19:15,193
Sheesh! You two get hit
by a bus or something? Ha!

373
00:19:18,115 --> 00:19:21,449
Hey! Wouldn't you know it?

374
00:19:21,661 --> 00:19:23,652
I accidentally overstocked
some inventory,

375
00:19:23,871 --> 00:19:26,659
so, how's about you each take one item
from the gift shop,

376
00:19:26,874 --> 00:19:27,864
on the house, you know?

377
00:19:28,084 --> 00:19:29,620
-Really?
-What's the catch?

378
00:19:29,835 --> 00:19:32,953
That catch is do it before I change
my mind. Now take something.

379
00:19:33,631 --> 00:19:35,167
-Hmm...
-Ooh! (CHUCKLES)

380
00:19:38,260 --> 00:19:39,216
Hmm.

381
00:19:39,428 --> 00:19:40,463
That ought to do the trick!

382
00:19:40,680 --> 00:19:44,969
And I will have a grappling hook!

383
00:19:46,018 --> 00:19:47,099
Yes!

384
00:19:47,311 --> 00:19:49,393
Wouldn't you rather have,
like, a doll or something?

385
00:19:52,233 --> 00:19:53,598
Grappling hook!

386
00:19:53,818 --> 00:19:54,774
Fair enough!

387
00:19:58,155 --> 00:20:01,864
DIPPER: <i>This journal told me there
was no one in Gravity Falls I could trust.</i>

388
00:20:02,076 --> 00:20:05,034
<i>But when you battle a hundred
gnomes side by side with someone,</i>

389
00:20:05,246 --> 00:20:08,739
<i>you realize that they've probably
always got your back.</i>

390
00:20:09,625 --> 00:20:10,740
Hey, Mabel, could you get the light?

391
00:20:11,168 --> 00:20:12,624
I'm on it.

392
00:20:14,213 --> 00:20:15,248
It worked!

393
00:20:15,631 --> 00:20:16,746
(BOTH LAUGHING)

394
00:20:17,133 --> 00:20:18,043
Grappling hook.

395
00:20:18,259 --> 00:20:21,001
DIPPER: <i>Our uncle told us there was
nothing strange about this town.</i>

396
00:20:21,470 --> 00:20:25,429
<i>But who knows what other secrets
are waiting to be unlocked?</i>

397
00:20:38,612 --> 00:20:39,602
(GROANS)